What to Do When You"re Still in Love - And They Aren"t?
There are few things in life more painful than being told, "I'm not in love with you anymore," by someone you're still in love with.
It can feel like your whole world has caved in.
Worst of all, you just don't know what to do or where to turn.
If you're in this situation, try to calm yourself down and clear your head as much as possible.
There ARE things you can do.
First, just because your ex says they don't love you, doesn't necessarily mean it's true.
He or she may still care about you.
Often people say they're no longer in love to end a relationship, when the reason is something very different.
But even if your ex does still love you, it might still be a good idea to end the relationship.
Something caused your breakup.
And even if you didn't want it, even if you feel like you're still in love, if the reason was serious enough, it may be better for both of you to move on.
If this is the case, in time you will be able to see more clearly what's best for you and your ex.
If you both wanted to break up, and now you've realized you're still in love and you're finding it more difficult than you expected, you should still consider whether the relationship was unhealthy and you might be better off letting go.
While it may not feel so right now, it might actually be easier to get over your pain than to go back into a hurtful relationship.
Even if your ex is interested I giving it another try, don't be so hasty.
Again, even though you feel like you're still in love, you broke up for some reason.
It might feel good to think about getting back together.
You might be very hopeful.
And if you do, you'll probably have a very good period - a "honeymoon period" - when things are great! But it's unlikely those feelings will last.
Before long you'll be back where you were when you broke up, and the cycle will start all over again.
If you really do believe you're still in love with your ex, and you believe in your heart that the relationship is worth saving, then you must take steps to first, get your ex back (if he or she isn't willing yet), and second, make sure whatever problems caused you to break up don't resurface.
"I'm still in love" is not enough.
See a relationship counselor or start by reading one of the many excellent relationship ebooks available online.
If you're going to do it again, do it right.
And you'll BOTH be saying "I'm still in love" twenty years from now.
It can feel like your whole world has caved in.
Worst of all, you just don't know what to do or where to turn.
If you're in this situation, try to calm yourself down and clear your head as much as possible.
There ARE things you can do.
First, just because your ex says they don't love you, doesn't necessarily mean it's true.
He or she may still care about you.
Often people say they're no longer in love to end a relationship, when the reason is something very different.
But even if your ex does still love you, it might still be a good idea to end the relationship.
Something caused your breakup.
And even if you didn't want it, even if you feel like you're still in love, if the reason was serious enough, it may be better for both of you to move on.
If this is the case, in time you will be able to see more clearly what's best for you and your ex.
If you both wanted to break up, and now you've realized you're still in love and you're finding it more difficult than you expected, you should still consider whether the relationship was unhealthy and you might be better off letting go.
While it may not feel so right now, it might actually be easier to get over your pain than to go back into a hurtful relationship.
Even if your ex is interested I giving it another try, don't be so hasty.
Again, even though you feel like you're still in love, you broke up for some reason.
It might feel good to think about getting back together.
You might be very hopeful.
And if you do, you'll probably have a very good period - a "honeymoon period" - when things are great! But it's unlikely those feelings will last.
Before long you'll be back where you were when you broke up, and the cycle will start all over again.
If you really do believe you're still in love with your ex, and you believe in your heart that the relationship is worth saving, then you must take steps to first, get your ex back (if he or she isn't willing yet), and second, make sure whatever problems caused you to break up don't resurface.
"I'm still in love" is not enough.
See a relationship counselor or start by reading one of the many excellent relationship ebooks available online.
If you're going to do it again, do it right.
And you'll BOTH be saying "I'm still in love" twenty years from now.
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